Posts Tagged African American
October is Family History Month
Posted by admin in Demographics and Statistics, History on October 10th, 2009
October is Family History Month. Federal, local and state governments (and genealogy services) are encouraging people to use the month of October to learn about their heritage and history. The 2002 resolution is here if you’re interested.
I shared in an earlier post that my first ancestor in America arrived via a slave ship from Africa in the mid 1700s. The ship landed in Annapolis, Maryland and my relative was sold to a tobacco farmer in St. Mary’s County, Maryland. When that farmer died in 1785, he left over two hundred slaves to his son, Richard Barnes. When Richard died in 1804, his will declared freedom for all of his slaves with the proviso that they take the surname Barnes. James Barnes, my great (times eight) grandfather was one of those freed slaves. I am fascinated by this story of my heritage and grateful to have this information.
The Catholic Church kept records of every birth, baptism and death, regardless of color. But just imagine, prior to the Emancipation, for the most part, African American slaves didn’t have surnames, marriage records, birth certificates, or any documentation of their existence.
Recently the search site Ancestry.com has added the records of more than 30,000 slaves from shipping manifests. The manifests document the movement of slaves from the Mid-Atlantic States to the Deep South in the 1810 to 1860 period. The records will help some African Americans search their roots.
I think all of this information reinforces to me how significant it is that my family came to this country as property. I know that makes so many people uncomfortable, but it is a fact. Not a fact that we should use as an excuse or cushion. But a fact that makes it more difficult for African Americans to search their roots. A fact that brings up emotions I don’t even want to address in this post. And maybe because of that fact in our history, we should use this month to begin a search of our ancestors.
What do you think? Have you traced your roots? If so, tell me about your family. Have you ever thought about a genealogy search? What road blocks have you encountered? Or are you one of those people who don’t think we should learn about all that stuff? Or, like my husband (whose father’s search shows a relationship to Celine Dion) doesn’t find his history interesting? If so, let me hear about that too. Let’s talk…
Call me Angela
Posted by admin in Building Bridges, History on March 30th, 2009
My husband’s parents were born in Canada. In fact, my husband was the first one in his family to be born on American soil. When his mom was eight months pregnant with Marc, the family relocated to Massachusetts from a small suburb of Quebec.
My family has been in America a great deal longer. I have a Certificate of Baptism for my great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather on my mother’s side of the family. James Alexander Barnes was born in St. Mary’s County, Maryland on May 6, 1864. Over 100 years later my husband Marc was the first Dion born in the United States.
So, why is Marc is an American with no prefix? And why am I an African-American? Does that sound strange to anyone else out there? My husband spoke French until he went to public schools. I’ve had the Southern Maryland drawl in my genes since the 1800’s.
All of Marc’s aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. are still in Canada. When we visited Canada we stayed with Marc’s relatives. Some of his cousins showed us the touristy places, feed us, made sure we don’t get lost, etc. I felt comfortable, at home, despite the language barrier, because I was with family.
If I were to visit Africa, I couldn’t speak the language. I’d have to stay in a hotel room somewhere and hire a tour guide to show me around and tell me what to do and where to go. It’s not that I would mind visiting Africa. It just wouldn’t be the same as going home.
Does anyone get that? Am I making sense? I mean, I know that my ancestors were forced to come to this country from Africa. I know they were bought and sold like property. I know that my roots are African. I’m not offended if someone calls me African American. But my husband is much more of a Canadian American than I am an African American.
We haven’t made it easy: Colored, Negroes, the other “N” word, African-American, Black. White people don’t want to offend so they ask, “What do you want to be called?” Well, what do you want to be called? Do you think of the terms we keep coming up with for ourselves confuse others? Let’s talk…
Rules for Talking about Race
Posted by admin in Building Bridges, How to talk about race, Interracial relationships on February 8th, 2009
Before beginning a race discussion group, consider these criteria for group members and conducting discussions.
• Select a diverse group. Members should not just be of different races, but also different experiences. Try to get a good mix of men and women, different ages, married and singles, etc. Mixing the group allows differing perspectives and opinions to emerge.
• Begin with people you know. Having these complex conversations with people you haven’t already established a bond with might make it difficult to forgive. They don’t have to be your best friends, but perhaps coworkers you see every day, people you go to church with, neighbors, and/or family.
• Determine the logistics: where, when, how often, and how long will you meet. Everyone must be comfortable with the location. The more relaxed people are the more open they will be.
• Openly share hesitancies and expectations. I recommend openly discussing apprehensions each member may have about being a part of the discussion. Answer these questions: Why did you come to this group? How did you feel initially when asked to join this group? What do you expect to get from this group?
• Listen. Listen. Listen. Watch for frequent interruptions and conversation monopolizers to ensure everyone gets a chance to talk and listen.
• Don’t expect these conversations to be easy or fun – you may find yourself angry. You may experience other strong emotions. That’s normal. Remember to practice reflecting before reacting.
• Remember, and remind the group, to follow the Golden Rule when discussing race: Do [speak in a manner that is respectful] to others as you would have them do to you.
• You can’t come to race discussions with an agenda or a platform. Be ready to share thoughts and listen to some different opinions. The goal is not to get everyone to agree or to make them feel guilty if they don’t. That approach only shuts down the conversation. The goal is to increase communication and better understand and accept the diversity of people God has created.
• Just Do It! Schedule a meeting and invite people. Send emails; make phone calls or mail invitations. This would be a good place to openly share your own hesitancies and expectations.
If you have any questions, comments, suggestions or group experiences to share, please feel free to comment. These ideas and others are more fleshed out in the book Let’s Talk about Race.
The Washington, DC Football Team
Posted by admin in Building Bridges, How to talk about race, Stereotypes on February 2nd, 2009
I was talking to one of my former coworkers, a Native American, about my favorite football team, the Washington Redskins. As I went on and on about how frustrating it is to be a fan and have them lose week after week, she interrupted me and said with disdain, “Please never use that word again.” I did not know what she was talking about.
She didn’t sense my ignorance and continued, “It’s derogatory to my people. Anyone who uses that word, in my opinion, is insensitive and racist.” I eventually caught on that she was talking about the word, “Redskin.”
Since I had been a fan of the team for more than thirty years and never gotten such a response, and honestly never equated the football team with Native Americans, I immediately went into defensive mode.
“You can’t honestly think that I’m racist for using that word to describe a football team.”
“You need to stop using that word immediately.”
I didn’t have an answer. I sat there confused and hurt. Then I got angry. How dare she accuse me, challenge me and dictate what I can and cannot say. She didn’t really care about what I had to say or my innocent reason for saying it.
So, my friendly chat about football turned into a standoff. My coworker’s response shut down any further potential conversations I may have had with her about race. I felt unsafe and ambushed. I know my experiences and thoughts didn’t count as far as she was concerned.
To me, motive is a big part of the race discussion. People will say things that hurt me because I’m a black woman. That doesn’t mean they are intentionally hurting me. If I take the time to slow down and examine motives, I find I am more understanding and willing to listen, not indict and agitate the situation.
A word to people of color - Be careful how you respond when someone does or says something you think is racist. They may not care, but they may not know. But if you react in anger, you will never find out. You will thwart an opportunity to have an honest, open conversation about race.
I hate the “N” word. I don’t use it and I don’t think anyone else should either. But after this experience with the word Redskins, when I hear the “N” word, I try not to react in anger or accuse. Instead I want to talk about it. I’d like to think we could both calmly explain our perspectives and learn something about the other side. What do you think? Let’s talk…
The Cookies
Posted by admin in Current Events, Hatred, Stereotypes, Videos, You've Got to Be Kidding, the N word on January 30th, 2009
My last post had a cute two minute video. This one is a not so cute.
This is not a joke. A baker in Greenwich Village, New York thought these cookies would sufficiently honor our new president. He created the cookies for Inauguration Day and calls them “Drunken Negro Head” cookies and originally didn’t see anything wrong with the image. He only apologized due to the outrage. Did he really expect no controversy about this? What do you think? Let’s Talk…
What’s our excuse?
Posted by admin in Building Bridges, Videos on January 26th, 2009
You don’t have to be an animal lover to appreciate this video and it’s relevance to discussions about our diversity. What do you think? Can we learn something from the animals? Let’s talk…
Have we overcome?
Posted by admin in Current Events, Racism/Discrimination on January 21st, 2009
Is Barack Obama’s presidency an indication that racism is dead? It seems a lot of discussion is circling around this question. Should I, as a black woman breathe a sigh of relief because America has finally elected a black president?
Sure, President Obama certainly reminds us that we have come a long way from “colored” water fountains, water hoses and Jim Crow. But have we overcome racism?
When people assume racism is over because things are different today than they were 40, or even 20 years ago, I get frustrated. It implies that we can let our guard down, that we can move on with the next issue of the day because this black/white/brown/yellow thing is dead.
I’m sorry, but I don’t see that as the case at all. Yes we’re further along than we used to be, but in my opinion we still have a ways to go. When we equate racism with the images of the past, we do race relations and conversations an injustice.
No, I’m not afraid of a lynching but my experience is…
…my son’s classmate says the technology school accepted my son only because he’s black, not because of his grades and personality.
…I watch a television report of discrimination against blacks when hidden cameras record how differently interviewers treat applicants based on color.
…I see the media frenzy when a blond haired, blue eyed white girl is missing and nothing when someone abducts a black child.
…my brother tells me the police stopped him for no reason except driving a sports car.
… my husband and I get poor service in a restaurant and we’re not quite sure why.
…my friend tells me I should call the police on my Mexican neighbors for drinking beer in their back yard. The don’t speak English and she’s concerned they might be terrorists.
I know that racism is still here. My race affects the way I do business with the world. My race affects the way the world does business with me. It just does. Are we further along? Absolutely. Have we overcome? Absolutely not.
What do you think? Is racism dead? Let’s talk…
Stuff Black People Like
Posted by admin in Stereotypes, You've Got to Be Kidding on January 17th, 2009
After I wrote the post Stuff White People Like I figured I’d check out the Stuff Black People Like blog as well. Interesting, the white people blog had over 100 things white people like. The blog for blacks had just under a dozen. The moderator asked for post suggestions because he only had one black friend. For some reason this bothered me.
But I added my suggestions – Obama, TD Jakes and talking about race. I have found these to be true and since I had more than one black friend I thought my vote counted. Like I said in another post, I’m perfectly willing to offer my opinion. Not as the view of the entire black race, but as an intelligent, unbiased, insightful conclusion based on my experience and knowledge.
Some other people posted suggestions as well. Reading through them, some of the things people added bothered me: playing basketball, white women, the N word, ganging up on a single person and Hennessey.
I spent some time thinking this through and have to admit on this issue, I have a double standard. This felt disrespectful and perpetuated the stereotypical black male. It didn’t sit well with me at all. So why was I laughing at the stuff white people like and a little perturbed here?
Definitely a topic worth further discussion. So, what do you think about a white guy (with one black friend) writing about stuff black people like? What do you think about the stereotypical responses? Let’s talk…
The Experiment
Posted by admin in Current Events, Racism/Discrimination, segregation on January 13th, 2009
What if I were to tell you that a white family committed to only “Buy White” for the entire year? What if I said they created a website to document their progress? And on that site was this quote about the process, “They will live their lives as they normally do, except that each time they make an expenditure – from consumer goods to professional services to real estate and travel – they will make an exhaustive attempt to utilize [White] businesses and [White] professionals. In addition to actual new purchases, the Andersons will endeavor to convert any standing contracts (e.g. loans, bills, subscriptions, etc.) to adhere to these parameters.”
What is your initial reaction to this? How do you feel about a family committing to only buy from their own race? What do you think of a family that would deliberately exclude every other race from all of their purchasing decisions?
Actually, the above excerpt is from http://www.ebonyexperiment.com/pledge.html. The only thing I altered in the quote was I put the word “White” where the word “Black” was. The family in question does not plan to buy white for a year, they plan to buy black for the year. Does that change your opinion?
I must admit when I first found out about the Ebony Experiment, I was incredulous. I wondered if this was even legal. Then when I found out they had a team in place, media backing, and national support, I wondered how we might react if a white family decided to do the same thing.
As a black business owner you would think I’d be fine with this. But I’m not. Something about it smells of segregation, racism and exclusion. Something about it sounds hauntingly familiar to an unflattering time in our history. Something about it and the support of it makes me uncomfortable.
Is this okay for a black family to do? What do you think? Let’s Talk…
“Black” Questions
Posted by admin in Stereotypes on January 7th, 2009
A few years ago a book club conversation evolved into a discussion about racially segregated churches. As the token black at this particular meeting, someone asked me, “Why do think they [black people] prefer their own churches?”
It’s funny. I am one of those people who typically loves giving my opinions–passionately and sometimes obnoxiously. It never bothers me when people ask general questions about counseling, addictions, writing or women. I belong to each of these groups and freely offer insights and presume to speak for most everyone. But, for some reason, I don’t want to speak for all black people.
Why? Maybe because there’s a danger we’ll be clumped into a stereotype and people will assume we’re all alike. Let me make it abundantly clear that all black people are not alike.
I know you think you know that, but experience tells me differently.
Before I could answer the question about black churches, Cindy, a white woman whose parents were born in England, chimed in, “I used to live in Oxon Hill [a predominately black suburb of Maryland], so I can answer that.”
I glared at her. “Go ahead,” I said, “speak for my people.”
Once she gave her answer about different culture and music and preaching styles, I offered that over 70% percent of America’s churches are racially segregated. Instead of answering the original question, I posed a question to the group of white women, “Why do you all prefer the white church?”
I resented Cindy’s assumption that she could speak for all black people. So, Cindy couldn’t speak for black people but I didn’t want to either. What’s up with that?
After putting some thought into it, I decided I may not know what every black person thinks, feels or believes, but I sure knew more than this white woman of English ancestry.
Better me than her. So, go ahead, ask me questions about the black church, black hair or anything else. I’m perfectly willing to offer my opinion. Not as the view of the entire black race, but as an intelligent, unbiased, insightful conclusion based on my experience and knowledge.
What questions do you want to ask? What questions have others asked you? Let’s talk…
